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Animal Rights History Timeline » [1785-1837] Romantic Age » James Leigh Hunt

James Leigh Hunt

Carnivourous Duties-Rational Beings, True End of Philosophy

Reflector

[1811 Jan-Mar] [James Leigh Hunt], "Art. XI.—Account of a Familiar Spirit, who Visited and Conversed with the Author in a Manner Equally New and Forcible, Shewing the Carnivorous Duties of all Rational Beings and the True End of Philosophy," The Reflector: A Quarterly Magazine, on Subjects of Philosophy, Politics, and the Liberal Arts, 1 (1811 Jan-Mar): 86-99;Google Books: Online Library of Free eBooks).

Art. XI.—Account of a Familiar Spirit, who Visited and Conversed with the Author in a Manner Equally New and Forcible, Shewing the Carnivorous Duties of all Rational Beings and the True End of Philosophy.

"Will thou never been philosopher enough to leave off sacrificing calf's flesh?" [asked] the Prince of Nightmares.…"As you seem inclined at last, Mr. Reflector, to make proper use of my instructions, I will recount you some of my adventures, if you please, that you may relate them to your countrymen and teach them to appreciate the trouble I have with them."

But I am sorry to say, that I have had no small trouble with some of your poetical moralists as well as men of pleasure. Something, I confess, must be allowed to Pope, whose constitution hardly allowed him a hour's enjoyment; but and invalid so fond of good things might have spared the citizens and clergy a little. It must be owned also, that the good temper he really possessed did much honour to his philosophy, but it would have been greater could he have denied himself that silver saucepan. It seduced him into a hundred miseries. One night in particular I remember, after he had made a very sharp attack on Addison and a dish of lampreys, he was terribly used to my spirits, who appeared to him in the shape of so many flying pamphlets:—he awoke in great horror, crying out with a ghastly smile, like a man who pretend to go easily through a laborious wager, 'These things are my diversion."' With regard to Dr. Johnson, about whose masticating faculties so much has been said, people do not consider his great bulk and love of exercise: he may have eaten twice as much as nay one of his companions, but then he was twice as large and wanted twice as much enjoyment. I assure you all the tea he drank did not hurt him a jot: consider the size of he cups in those days and of the great man who empties them, and it was nothing but an April shower on Plinlimmon. It is true, he compelled my attendance somewhat too often, but not oftener than men of less size and much less right. The worst night he passed, was after he received his pension: he though that he was Osborne the bookseller, and that he was knocked down with the second volume of his folio dictionary.…

…Why, a great deal may be done," answered the spirit, "against horrors of any kind by mere dint of industry. But too much business, especially of a nature that keeps passion on the stretch, will sometimes perform the office of indolence and luxury, and turn revengefully upon the mind.…However, very few of those might men have been philosophers enough to resist the consoling enjoyments of the table; and with those, who have been more temperate either from interest or constitution, and occasional excess, however small, has done wonders in the way of punishment.…

…You must know, Mr. Reflector, that the souls of tormented animals survive after death and become instruments of punishment for mankind.…Fish crimped alive, lobsters boiled alive, and pigs whipped to death, become the most active and formidable spirits, and if the object of their vengeance take too many precautions to drown his senses when asleep, there is the subtle and fell Gout, waiting to torment his advanced years, a spirit partaking of the double nature of the Nightmare and Salamander, and more terrible than any one of us, inasmuch as he makes his attacks by day as well as by night.

…You do not recollect," answered the spirit, "what an abuse such excesses are of the divine gift of reason, and how they distort the best tendencies of human nature. This man will rise tomorrow morning, pallid, nervous, and sullen: his feeling must be reinforced with a dram to bear the ensuing afternoon; and I foresee, that the ill-temper arising from his debauch, will lead him into a very serous piece of injustice against his neighbour. To the same cause may be traced fifty or the common disquietudes of life, it's caprices, and irritabilities. To nigh a poor fellow is fretful because his supper was not rich enough, but to-morrow night he will be in torture because it was too rich.…

…"Well, well, Mr. Reflector," said the sprit, "now that you are getting grave on the subject, I think I may bid you adieu. Your nation has produced excellent philosophers, who were not the less wise for knowing little of me. Pray tell your country-men that they are neither philosophic nor politic in feasting as they do on all occasions, joyful, sorrowful or indifferent; that good sense, good temper, and the good of their country, are distinct things from indigestion; and that whey they think to shew their patriotic devotion by carving and gormandizing, there are no wiser than the bacchanals of old, who took serpents between their teeth and tortured themselves with knives.